Understanding proper cigar etiquette is essential, whether you’re a newcomer nervously searching “cigar lounge etiquette” on Google or an expert aficionado looking for a refresher. Cigar lounges have a unique atmosphere with unwritten rules meant to ensure everyone enjoys the experience. In this Cigar Lounge Etiquette 101 guide, we’ll define the do’s and don’ts of lounge behavior so you can fit right in and savor your stogie with confidence.
At its core, cigar etiquette comes down to respecting others, the lounge, and the craft of cigars. A good rule of thumb is to treat others and the lounge the way you’d want yours to be treated. Still, there are specific dos and don’ts in a cigar lounge that every enthusiast should know:
Do: Take your time and savor the cigar experience. Cigars are meant to be enjoyed slowly, not rushed. The ritual of cutting, lighting, and smoking is part of the pleasure. Don’t be in a hurry – a fine cigar can easily last an hour or more. Rushing through or chain-smoking cigars misses the point of relaxation and can come off as disrespectful to the culture.
Do: Be courteous and aware of others. Cigar lounges are social spaces, but not everyone wants to be overwhelmed. Keep voices at a polite volume and watch where your smoke is drifting. It’s good manners to blow smoke up or away from people, not in anyone’s face (no one enjoys a direct cloud of smoke). If you’re among friends, feel free to chat, but if someone is quietly enjoying their cigar, respect their space. And if you need to take a phone call, step outside or speak softly – most patrons come to the lounge to disconnect and unwind, not to hear a one-sided phone conversation.
Do: Come prepared with your own accessories. Bring a quality cigar cutter and lighter with you. Many lounges provide communal cutters, matches, or lighters, but it’s polite to have your own so you’re not always asking around. Importantly, never use a communal cutter on a cigar you’ve put in your mouth – for instance, don’t lick or wet the end of your cigar and then use the shared cutter. If you prefer to moisten or taste the cigar’s cap, do it only when using your personal cutter (no one wants to share your saliva!). So invest in a good cutter and lighter – you can find plenty of premium options on the market (check out the selection of cigar lighters and cutters on StogieHub’s marketplace for example). Having your own tools not only shows courtesy but also marks you as a prepared aficionado. Plus, you’ll avoid any awkward moments if the lounge’s one lighter is in use or a communal cutter has gone dull.
Do: Buy from the lounge (or at least support it). A fundamental unwritten rule in most cigar lounges is to purchase your cigars on-site rather than bringing outside cigars. The lounge’s business depends on cigar sales, and buying there is a gesture of respect and support. If you bring your own cigar, many lounges will charge a “cutting fee” or expect you to buy a drink or pay a corkage-like fee. It’s generally best to pick out a stick from their humidor – not only does this support the establishment, but it also lets you explore new cigars the shop carries. (Exceptions can be made for a rare or special cigar from your personal collection, but always ask the staff if it’s okay first.) The bottom line: if you’re using the lounge’s space, patronize the business.
Do: Handle the shop’s cigars with care. When you’re browsing the lounge’s humidor, avoid over-handling the merchandise. It’s perfectly fine to gently pick up a cigar to examine it, but do not ever sniff a cigar by sticking it right under your nose or, worse, licking it – especially if you aren’t buying it. Other customers won’t want a cigar that’s been manhandled or had someone’s nose and lips on it. Instead, to check a cigar’s aroma, hold it a couple inches from your nose to get a sense of the scent. And if you’re not sure what to choose, do ask the staff for recommendations – lounge staff are usually knowledgeable and happy to help you find a cigar that suits your taste.
Do: Use the ashtray and keep the area tidy. Ashing is part of cigar smoking, so use the provided ashtrays and try not to make a mess. Tap off your ash gently into the ashtray before it gets too long and falls onto the table or floor. A common guideline is to let an inch or so of ash build and then ash softly. Also, never leave your cigar burning unattended for long or abandon a half-finished cigar in a communal ashtray without intending to return – it’s messy and inconsiderate. And when you’re done, do NOT crush or stub out your cigar like it’s a cigarette. This is a big faux pas in cigar etiquette. Simply lay the cigar down in the ashtray and let it extinguish on its own. Grinding a cigar out produces a foul odor and is seen as an insult to the craftsmanship that went into it. Letting it die with dignity is the way to go.
Do: Mind the lounge’s atmosphere and rules. Different lounges have different vibes – some are quiet, library-like retreats, while others are more social and lively. Read the room and adapt. If it’s a cozy, quiet lounge, keep your voice low and conversations polite. If it’s a more boisterous spot with a game on TV, moderate banter is fine. Also pay attention to any posted house rules (or ask the staff about their policies). For example, some lounges have a dress code, specific seating rules, or time limits for how long you can sit without buying another cigar or drink. Following the house rules shows respect and ensures you’ll be welcome back.
Finally, be friendly and inclusive. Cigar lounges are great places to meet fellow aficionados. Feel free to strike up light conversation – you already have a common interest! A simple “What are you smoking there?” or complimenting someone’s cigar can open the door to a great chat. Just be mindful of social cues; if someone gives short answers or seems absorbed in thought (or in their phone or book), it’s polite not to press. On the other hand, many regulars love sharing knowledge and stories. One thing to avoid is snobbery – don’t be the person who brags or belittles others’ cigar choices. Every smoker has their own taste. Etiquette is about making everyone feel comfortable, regardless of whether they’re puffing a $5 bundle cigar or a top-shelf Cuban. As one guide puts it, refrain from cigar snobbery and respect every smoker’s choice. The lounge is a shared sanctuary; leave egos at the door.
Now that we’ve covered many do’s, let’s highlight the crucial “don’ts” – behaviors that will mark you as a newbie or, worse, offend others in the lounge:
Don’t bring in outside cigars without supporting the lounge. As mentioned earlier, it’s poor form to waltz in with a handful of cigars you bought elsewhere and use the lounge’s facilities without buying anything. This can be viewed as freeloading. If you have a special cigar you’re itching to smoke, at least ask if it’s okay and buy a couple of cigars or drinks from the lounge in exchange. Many lounges will understand if you purchase something. The key is to never be seen as taking advantage of the lounge.
Don’t light up without checking the room or getting permission if needed. In a public cigar lounge, it’s usually obvious that smoking is welcome everywhere. But if you’re at a private event or someone’s home lounge, always ask before lighting a cigar. Even in some lounges, there might be designated smoking sections. It’s just polite to confirm, “Mind if I light this here?” if you have any doubt. This extends to other forms of smoking too – don’t assume cigarettes, pipes, or vaping are allowed in a cigar lounge. Many cigar lounges ban cigarette smoking or vaping because the smell or huge vape clouds can disrupt the cigar aroma for others. Stick to cigars unless you know other forms are permitted.
Don’t use improper lighting methods. A big etiquette no-no is using a candle or Zippo-style lighter (with lighter fluid) to light a cigar. These can impart bad flavors. Use butane torches, wooden matches, or cedar spills for a clean light. If all you have is a candle on the table, don’t be that guy and set your cigar to the candle flame – it looks silly and the scented wax can ruin the taste. Instead, ask a fellow patron or the staff for a proper lighter or matches. Most will be happy to help a prepared smoker, especially if you asked nicely. (Bonus tip: When someone offers you a light, it’s polite to toast the foot of your cigar first and then gently puff. And remember to say thank you!)
Don’t blow smoke towards people or in enclosed spaces. We touched on this, but it bears repeating: be aware of your smoke. Even among cigar lovers, nobody enjoys a face full of smoke. If you’re in close quarters, try to exhale upward or in a direction with no one directly in line. In some lounges with poor ventilation, big clouds can linger – be extra considerate in those situations. And definitely do not jokingly “shotgun” someone with cigar smoke (yes, we’ve heard of pranksters doing this) – it’s very rude and you might earn some dirty looks or worse.
Don’t hog the space or furniture. If you’re alone, don’t sprawl out and occupy a giant table meant for a group, especially when the lounge is busy. Conversely, if the lounge is crowded and seating is scarce, be open to sharing a larger table with others if appropriate (after a friendly “Mind if I join you here?”). It’s all about being considerate. Also, keep your belongings tidy; don’t spread your coat, bags, and accessories over multiple chairs or the whole counter.
Don’t forget common courtesy with communal items. Along with cutters and lighters, be mindful with communal ashtrays. Don’t let your cigar rest and smolder in an ashtray that others are actively using – it can blow smoke right at them. And as mentioned, don’t smash your cigar out in the ashtray when finished – just let it be. If ashtrays are limited and you need to share, place yours on the edge and give others room to use it too. Cleaning up any loose ash you spill is a nice touch (use a napkin or ask staff for a broom if you made a big oops).
Don’t wear heavy cologne or perfume. This is a subtle but important point: a cigar lounge is all about the aroma of the cigars. Walking in doused in strong fragrance is a faux pas because it overpowers the scent of tobacco. You might love your $200 designer perfume, but others in the room likely don’t want to smell it mixed with their Padron’s rich aroma. Keep your personal scents subtle or, better yet, neutral when visiting a lounge. Likewise, if you just came from a heavy meal or smoke session elsewhere, a quick freshen-up (wash your hands, maybe a mint for your breath) can be considerate so you’re not bringing in any funky odors.
Don’t be “that guy” who lectures or flaunts. There’s often one person in a lounge who loves to show off their cigar knowledge uninvited or brag about their rare collection loudly. Don’t be that guy. It’s fine to share if someone asks, but avoid giving unsolicited advice or critiques. For instance, if a fellow smoker chooses a flavored cigar or a brand you personally dislike, keep it to yourself. Nothing kills the friendly vibe faster than condescension or one-upmanship. Cigar lounges are not the place for elitism or gatekeeping – everyone is there to enjoy themselves. Encourage others and celebrate the shared hobby, don’t turn it into a competition of who knows more or who spent more. As the Connecticut Cigar Company cheekily advises, don’t be the “I only smoke Cubans” guy who dismisses other cigars. It’s just bad etiquette and you might miss out on great non-Cuban smokes (not to mention come across as pretentious).
Don’t ask to borrow or mooch repeatedly. It’s okay if you occasionally need a cutter or forgot your lighter – cigar folks are generally friendly and will lend you one. But don’t be the person who never brings their own and always asks others for a cutter, lighter, or even cigars. Similarly, while offering cigars to others is a gracious gesture, asking someone to give you one (unless they’re a close friend) is not polite. If a regular offers you a cigar to try, gratefully accept it, but don’t start expecting free handouts. And definitely don’t ask to puff someone else’s cigar – sharing cigars is unhygienic and usually unwelcome unless you’re very close with that person. In short, be self-sufficient and don’t be a mooch. If you find you’re missing something, most lounges sell what you need (cigars, cutters, lighters, even drinks and snacks). It circles back to supporting the establishment and being prepared.
Don’t ignore the staff or basic manners. The lounge staff are there to help and to keep the place running. Greet them when you come in, be polite when ordering or asking questions, and settle your tab without quibbling. If they assisted you in cutting or lighting your cigar or gave a solid recommendation, a small tip is a nice way to say thanks (many lounges have waitstaff or attendants – tipping them as you would a bartender or server is appropriate, typically 15-20% of your purchase). And of course, clean up after yourself when you leave: don’t leave cigar bands, cellophane, empty glasses, or other trash scattered about. Tidying up shows respect for the next person and for those who work there.
By following these do’s and don’ts, you’ll not only avoid faux pas but also elevate your overall cigar lounge experience. Good etiquette enhances the camaraderie and relaxation that cigar smoking is all about. Remember, every cigar aficionado was a beginner once – so if you’re new, don’t be intimidated. Observing and emulating the respectful behavior of experienced regulars is one of the best ways to learn. And if you’re ever unsure about a lounge’s specific customs, just ask. Cigar enthusiasts tend to be a welcoming bunch to those who show genuine interest and courtesy.
Lastly, keep in mind that cigar etiquette can evolve with the times. Modern lounges might be more relaxed about certain things (for example, some might allow smartphone use or have communal cutters with sanitizing wipes available). But the timeless principles – respect, courtesy, and common sense – never go out of style. As one famous example from history: in 19th-century Havana, it was considered an insult to give another smoker a light from your cigar (so even back then, they emphasized courtesy and doing things the proper way!). While you likely won’t encounter that scenario today, the spirit of respect remains the same.
Now you’re equipped with the knowledge of what to do and what not to do in a cigar lounge. So sit back in that leather chair, light up your favorite stick (with a butane lighter or match – not a candle!), and enjoy the rich flavors and good company. By following this Cigar Lounge Etiquette 101 guide, you’ll fit right in and perhaps even help a newcomer yourself one day. Happy smoking, and see you at the lounge!
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